No. 22 – A book with more than 500 pages

Confessions of a Forty-Something F**k Up / Alexandra Potter

This book has 547 pages but the last 43 turned out to be preview chapters of books yet to come. I find this annoying to a level where I make loud sounds of disappointment and anger: you’re reading and then out of the blue, bam, book done. It’s like climbing stairs but you’re already at the top or bottom and there’s nothing to step left. It’s weird. (It’s also very easy to land on your face.) In the end the book came in at 504 pages so it still counts for the challenge. Which I was happy with because, staying on topic, I have to confess I don’t read a lot of big books.
Nice as they might be, they are just too impractical as it requires both hands to carry the weight, which rules out reading on public transport and in bed. They also take up too much weight and volume in my bag to carry them along. And yes, an e-reader could solve those problems, but for me this would be the only argument to use them and that’s simply not enough. Instead, I just extra enjoy those moments where I do have time and the right mindset to sit down and dive in. And did I dive! Despite its volume, I finished this book in one day. That’s a record for me but it’s an easy read and to be honest, the layout helped, with pleasant font, size and alignment. Also, I had no other plans and was not in the mood for chores so basically it meant as long as I was reading, I didn’t have to do laundry.
And yes, of course, it was the title that made me gravitate towards this book, but I’ve read and liked other books by this author (Me & Mr. Darcy, Who’s That Girl?) so picking this up was a no-brainer.

Nell is the forty-something f**k-up from the title. Returning to London after losing a business and a fiancé in the US, she has to start over again at an age where she had pictured herself all set. Instead, she’s now renting a room and sharing the flat with her landlord. She’s back to basics on the job front as well, lucky to land a freelance gig writing obituaries. She’s not keen on meeting up with her parents, fearing a second degree questioning from her mother. And while she is keen on meeting up with old friends again, they have all moved on and don’t have time for wild nights out or even coffee in the city, as they are too busy dropping kids off at various places.
Seeing her friends married with children and living in houses they own instead of rent, makes Nell feel less than capable and their Instagram feeds of perfect kitchens, baked goodies and glamping trips, leave her crying in self-doubt.
I guess this is exactly why doctors and psychologists warn against the use of social media. I naively also thought that grown-ups would know better, but I’m not on Instagram or TikTok, so I don’t know how addictive it can be.
Instead of going offline, Nell keeps torturing herself with self-doubt, and when she finally realizes she needs to talk to someone, she decides on the broke-ass version of therapy and buys herself a microphone, downloads an app and starts to podcast.
When she learns her first episode had two listeners, she already feels less alone and continues to podcast.
Out in the real world, she makes friends with an elderly widow she met writing the husband’s obituary. This lady (Cricket) lost friends when she lost her husband and also has to start over in life. So, when Nell has tickets for a concert, she invites Cricket, and when Cricket needs help donating her husband’s clothes to charity, she calls Nell.
Although Cricket seems to be coping well and moving on, Nell discovers that not only might people paint a different picture online, even in real life people put on a brave face to hide their true feelings.
I’s easy to relate to Nell: who hasn’t questioned her own plans, or compared herself to friends? Insecurities are for all ages. Ditto for arguments with roommates, the horrors of (online) dating, and the ups and downs in friendships.
Being the only one of your friends without a relationship or children, was something I related to as well, but even if you don’t, it’s easy to get into Nell’s mindset.
And Nell’s mindset is not something only relatable to the readers, but of course, her podcast audience keeps growing as well. I won’t spoil anything more than this.

One of the blurbs mentions Bridget Jones and it’s easy to compare the two. However, where Bridget Jones was more romantic comedy and about finding love, this book is about being okay with yourself, even when yourself is not at her best.
That makes this book more women’s fiction than romantic comedy and it’s a cosy and easy read.
The sequel is about to be released any moment but I’m waiting a bit so as not to overdo it.
And the same applies to the tv series. I watched the first ten minutes of the first episode, and although it seems more inspired by than based on, I need some more distance before watching this.
(Not Dead Yet is streaming on Disney+ here, not sure about other countries.)

No. 17 –  A recommendation

The reading list / Sara Nisha Adams

Things just got meta: I read a book titled The Reading List for my reading list.
This book was recommended to me by my colleague and fellow librarian, E. As you might imagine, E and I talk books A Lot and recommend titles to each other all the time, and while she has the courage to join a book club, I stick to my trusted reading challenge.
This book was a wonderful read and I can’t wait to tell you about it, so here goes.

The Reading List takes place in Wembley, London, where different members of the community find themselves thrown into reading, after finding a list of book titles.
Main characters are Mukesh and Aleisha. Mukesh is a grieving widower, trying to find his readjusted place within his family, and society in general. Aleisha is a teenage girl, who landed herself a summer job at the local library branch despite not liking reading. She lives at home with an older brother and a mother who has mental health issues. Her mother’s illness is a huge stress factor for Aleisha and her brother, although they both refuse to acknowledge that. It’s Aleisha’s brother who suggested she work at the library, because he did one summer and loved it and is convinced she will too.
One day at work, Aleisha finds a list of book titles that was stuck between the pages of a returned book and with lack of anything better to do, she starts reading the first book on the list: To Kill a Mockingbird.
Simultaneously, Mukesh finds a library book his late wife forgot to return, and starts reading it to feel closer to her. The Time Traveller’s Wife resonates with him and he decides to read more. So, he goes to the library where Aleisha suggests he reads To Kill a Mockingbird.
Because she never read much, she has no other books to recommend to patrons and after the success of the first book on the list, she continues with the next.
Rebecca first freaks out Aleisha, then Mukesh. And one after the other they get to experience the emotional rollercoaster that is The Kite Runner.
It’s wonderful to read about people discovering the joys of reading. It’s even better when they are reading and talking about books you have read yourself.

Aleisha and Mukesh don’t just start reading, they start stepping out of their comfort zones: Mukesh hesitantly goes out again, meets up with old friends and makes new ones. Aleisha takes off her headphones and connects with the people she sees around.
When Mukesh’ daughters start mingling in his private live, he imagines them as the Bennet sisters. He channels his inner Atticus Finch when a friend is going through a tough time, trying his best to find the right words for the situation. He reminds himself that if Pi could survive on a boat with a tiger, he will survive organizing a gathering for friends. Aleisha wants to become a lawyer and is in awe of Atticus Finch. She also discovers that reading out loud to her mother not only has a calming effect on her mother, but it also helps create a connection they haven’t felt in years.

Aleisha and Mukesh’ chapters are mixed with chapters about other people, all finding the same reading list throughout the years.
The further along the story gets, the less attention there is for the books on the list, especially near the end, and I had a hard time remembering which the last two books on the list were (Beloved and A Suitable Boy).
Despite the somewhat rushed feeling of the ending, this book is a joy. It’s about reading, libraries, friendships and love. Do not expect a fluffy book though, as it packs some punches and although those punches can be seen coming, they still hit hard.

All in all, The Reading List is a warm and wonderful read and I heartily pass on the recommendation.

No. 5 – A book with a person’s name in the title

Lily : A tale of revenge / Rose Tremain

I spotted this book over a year ago in a bookshop and wasn’t sure about it then, and gave monetary priority to other titles. Then recently I stumbled upon it yet again and this time with a discount, so I thought to go for it after all as the picture was still on my phone (does anybody else take pictures of books they can’t afford?). As it turned out I should have listened to my book instincts and left it, no matter how much off it was.

The cover is nice enough. The title and description on the back, intriguing enough. Yet reading it, left me feeling confused and disappointed: I didn’t understand what this book was meant to be. Murder mystery? Victorian guilt trip? A story of unrequited love? The title calls it “a tale of revenge”, but revenge indicates a certain ruthlessness, a desire, that I found lacking. This was more about the guilt that follows the act of revenge, rather than the emotions that drove to it. And yet it was all very melodramatic. Like I said, I feel confused.

Lily has committed a murder. That much is clear even before you start the book.
The story is told in a now and then, telling of Lily’s childhood and how she came to be where she is now. The chapters are roughly on and off, but it’s not indicated with a timing (the chapters have titles instead), and sometimes it takes a few sentences to realize where the story is in the timeline, especially in the beginning when new characters get introduced in both the past and the present. It doesn’t read easy and although I don’t mind using my brain, but it’s annoying when you have to think about these things instead of the story itself.

And the story just wasn’t really pulling me in at any point. I thought the build-up was too long, too slow, without enough surprise or tension for the big moment. By the time the murder happened, I was just glad that it happened. There was so much guilt about it, so much internal struggle from page one onwards that the event didn’t even have that much of an impact. Then a confession happens much later, odd in both timing and setting.
Even stranger was the ending, which I didn’t get, or maybe by then I was too annoyed by the melodramatics.
Clearly, this book and I turned out to be a bad match.
I’m wishing happy readings to others (I’m donating my book to a second-hand shop), but this book wasn’t for me.

No. 18 – A book with snow on the cover

The Wish / Nicholas Sparks

Years ago someone tried to shame me for not having read a Nicholas Sparks book. Needless to say, that did not make me run to the library/bookshop for one of his titles any faster.
(Don’t worry, this was a complete stranger and not someone I had to cut out of my life.)
Then during last year’s Christmas break, I treated myself to a trip to the bookshop and ended up at the register with a copy of The Wish. It had a cozy cover with snow which I was in the mood for, and I figured it was about time that I give this author a try after all.
However, the book ended up on my TBR pile and it wasn’t until this weekend, on the hottest days of the year so far, that I picked it up. You can never predict when the mood strikes you.
By the time I finished the book I had half-melted. Unfortunately that wasn’t because of the story, but purely due to the heat.

I’ll try not to give away more than what it says on the preamble on the cover while expressing my reading experience.

This book is a tearjerker with frosting for extra sweetness on top.
It’s set during Christmas time and the main character is Maggie, a successful photographer who shot to fame due to social media.
The gallery she co-owns gets visited by fans who hope to catch a glimpse of her.  
Maggie got pregnant at sixteen and was made to sit out the pregnancy, waiting for the baby to be born so it could be adopted. She does this far away from home, on an island off the North Carolina coast.
There she meets Bryce, who at eighteen is basically superman: he’s cute, non-judgmental, patient, smart, sweet and caring. He helps out anyone; from his mother, to his fisherman grandfather and the ladies running a diner in the only town on the island. He also helps homeschooling Maggie, and he received recommendations from multiple Senators for his West Point application. Oh, and he trains aid dogs.

Over the course of a few days Maggie tells the story of how she and Bryce fell in love during those six months way back when.
She is talking to the gallery’s new sales assistant whom we get to know little about expect that he is very much in love with his girlfriend and can skate really well.

I don’t mind an emotional punch or two and have sobbed over books many a time, but this felt a bit like an attempt to cram as much emotional stuff in there as possible: Adoption. YA angst. Lost loves. Other stuff. Christmas time.
Subtle it is not. As a result nothing of the story came as a surprise to me and it left me with an “is this it?” feeling.
Maybe my expectations were too high after all the praise from friends who read the other books.
Maybe these books just aren’t for me.
Based on this title, I’m not in a rush to try more.